Grieving through the Holidays

 I won't disturb your holiday, so this will is coming a few days early. Hopefully it brings relief. 
- Christina💓

Coping with the loss of a loved one during the holidays can feel especially heavy, and as a Black woman managing anxiety, the intersection of grief, cultural expectations, and mental health can be complex. 

This year I lost two grandparents, 3 months. 3 days apart. I’ve had many loved ones pass over the last 5 years, but this year at thanksgiving I actually had grieving moments. I lived over 33 years with those two and now I have to imagine and still exist without them. Talk about hard! It’s easy for me and I know I’m not alone. 

Here’s a thoughtful guide to help:

1. Honor Their Memory

• Create a Tribute: Light a candle, cook their favorite dish, get a keepsake item in their memory, or share stories with others who knew them. These acts can make their presence feel close.

• Carry a Tradition: Incorporate a holiday tradition they cherished or create a new one in their honor.

2. Set Boundaries

• Protect Your Energy: Politely decline gatherings or conversations that feel overwhelming.

• Prioritize Rest: Recognize that grief can drain you and balance social commitments with quiet moments.

3. Find Joy in the Small Things

• Focus on activities that ground you: watching a nostalgic movie, journaling, or sipping tea. Small joys don’t erase grief but can ease the weight.

4. Lean Into Your Support System

• Talk It Out: Share your feelings with trusted loved ones or a therapist.

• Seek Culturally Competent Help: Connecting with professionals or groups that understand the Black experience can feel validating.

5. Embrace Your Spirituality

• Whether through prayer, meditation, or connecting with ancestors, use your spiritual practices as a source of comfort and grounding.

6. Practice Mindful Grieving

• Acknowledge Your Emotions: It’s okay to cry, reminisce, or even laugh. Grief is non-linear.

• Focus on Breathing Techniques: When anxiety rises, grounding exercises like the 4-7-8 technique can bring calm.

7. Give Yourself Grace

• Remember that it’s okay to have moments of sadness, and you don’t have to meet every holiday expectation. Taking care of yourself is the most meaningful way to honor your healing.

If you’re navigating grief this holiday season, remember that you don’t have to do it alone. Take a moment to check in with yourself and ask: What do I need to feel supported today? Whether it’s reaching out to a friend, journaling your feelings, or simply taking time to breathe, prioritize your well-being.

Share your thoughts in the comments or connect with someone who might need a reminder that they’re not alone. Let’s support each other through this journey, one step at a time.